Don’t know how I’m doing anything, but I am

From my journal dated January 13, 2003:

Another day gone…the days all seem to run together. I just endure them all. I do stuff – whatever I need to do for the day – but it just seems of so little value.

My heart really isn’t into school this quarter. I’m not putting a fraction of the work I should into it. I haven’t done any of the math homework I need to get done for tomorrow, read hardly any of the English or Econ books. Ugh! Gotta get with the program if I’m going to do this [school] and do it well.

Yesterday I got a Dean’s List notification for last quarter. It just amazes me that I can be so broken – so crushed – and still maintain that GPA. Been on the Dean’s List every quarter. I don’t know how I’m doing it, but I am. I don’t know how I’m doing anything, but I am.

© 2011 Rebecca R. Carney

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