Carrying Your Child’s Legacy

For some reason, this really made a lot of sense to me as I read it. We, as parents, see the hope for tomorrow in our children. They are our “legacy,” as the writer says. Our days are forward-looking as we imagine, hope and dream of wonderful things for our children.

After our child dies, bereaved parents, especially mothers, feel a huge responsibility to make sure their child is not forgotten. It seems inconceivable that our child is gone, that he/she will not experience the hopes and dreams we have held in our hearts for our children. It then becomes our responsibility to try to carry forth a legacy for our child in a form that has meaning for us individually. It’s not exactly a backwards-looking point of view – because no one can truly move forward while looking backwards – but one that calls out, “Remember, remember, please remember my precious child. Remember his life, remember that he lived and loved and added wonderful things to this life. Please don’t forget him.”

Some people start foundations or become grief counselors or write. Whatever we do, we want our child’s life – and death – to have meaning. We want to carry on the legacy of our child.

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Legacy. So many definitions of legacy float around mankind but ultimately it comes down to children. Our children are our legacy. It’s probably why when people aren’t able to have them that so much of their work centers around what they are able to leave behind them. It may come in the form of an endowment or library but the end result is they still finding a way to carry themselves ahead. Our children are what carries us forward in a million different way. They carry our hair,  eyes and quirky personality. They take with them the portions of who we are that are most important and the traits that had the biggest impact on forming who they become. They provide us with a sense of reassurance that when we leave the world, at whatever point that may be, that we as a person do not end.  It’s an element of permanence that helps to keep us settled. They pass those family characteristics, annoying habits and…

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5 thoughts on “Carrying Your Child’s Legacy

  1. Carrying on a legacy of just trying to find justice when none seems to be forthcoming – parents are forever attached to their children.

    Having formed, Justice for Raymond as a means to keep in touch with family and friends, I have become aware that there is another group of grieving parents that can not find why, how, when, where and who of their child’s death.

    After five years and multiple court appearances with the widow of my son Ray, I have learned a lot about the so-called justice system and death investigation. I am now sharing other, similar stories where the parents have a deceased child that certainly is other than ‘natural causes’ due to toxicology reports and information gathered, but the coroner or local law enforcement is blocking information and an investigation.

    I am sorry for your loss of two children, there is no grief like that of losing a child.
    God bless.

  2. while I lost my only sibling, not a child, i can completely relate to this. when our parents are gone we’ll have only have each other and now i don’t have him. and i’m finding myself with a strong urge to keep his memory alive so people remember he was here, that he contributed… and that he MATTERED. that’s why i began blogging in the first place… to have a way to “talk” to him in a way that works for me along with keeping his story alive in the minds of others.

    i’m so glad i found your blog, i really enjoy your posts. thank you!!!

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