HEY, VICTIM……

I think most parents who have lost a child can relate to the recent blog on Soul Searching Solace about being labeled a “victim” for not moving on “quickly enough.”

https://onewomansperspective02.wordpress.com/2011/08/02/people-are-getting-tired-of-our-troubles/

Soul Searching Solace

“You can be a victim in one situation but that doesn’t mean you are a victim in all situations. I’m just saying.”

Not positive, but I believe these words were directed toward me (in a sly way) after I expressed my hurt and disappointment in people in my life who I feel have not been there for me since Ben’s death. If they were meant for me, those words came from a person who I loved but have not spoken with in more than a year and a half. They hurt me deeply.

If I am allowed to be a “victim” in only one situation, I obviously became one on the day that Ben died. I supposedly used up my one chance then so I guess that means that I am to separate everything that has happened to me since Ben’s death, and who I now am, from the actual…

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One thought on “HEY, VICTIM……

  1. Some – most – people don’t know how to handle grief – especially the grief of others. They don’t like the way a grieving person makes them feel and they want to get back to the old relationship – prior to the grief. Victimhood is imposed upon us by events beyond our control. What matters is how we handle our future, gathering strength from tragedy and – eventually – facing life full on. It is painful when family and others can’t understand the process of grief and its time-frame that is unique to every person who has ever grieved.

    Peace to you.

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