Everything I own

Sitting at work today, working away while Pandora plays on my computer, and a song comes on called “Everything I Own” by a group called Bread. There are times when words from a song just hit me right in the heart. Perhaps not all of the words fit, but sometimes it strikes a chord with the longing that I feel in my heart. This song is one of those.

 

Everything I Own

Lyrics (partial)

…And I would give anything I own,
I’d give up my life, my heart, my home
I would give everything I own,
Just to have you back again
Is there someone you know,
Your loving them so,
But taking them all for granted?
You may lose them one day
Someone takes them away,
And they don’t hear the words you long to say
I would give anything I own,
I’d give up my life, my heart, my home
I would give everything I own,
Just to have you back again
Just to touch you once again

 

Jason, oh, how I wish I could have you back again.

~Becky

© 2019 Rebecca R. Carney

This entry was posted in Death of a child, Grief and tagged , by Rebecca Carney - One Woman's Perspective. Bookmark the permalink.

About Rebecca Carney - One Woman's Perspective

My name is Becky Carney. My husband, Joe, and I have been married for 42 years. We have two living children, Eric (39) and Jenna (34). We lost a baby in utero at 19 weeks in 1987. In 2002, our middle son, Jason (19), and his best friend, Alina (20), were broadsided by a drunk driver who was going at least twice the speed limit. They both died instantly. This blog is written from my perspective as a bereaved parent. I don't claim to know what it's like to walk in anyone else's shoes. Each situation is different; each person is different. Everyone handles grief differently. But if I can create any degree of understanding of what it's like to be a parent who has lost a child, then I have succeeded in my reason for writing this blog.

10 thoughts on “Everything I own

  1. from one grieving mother to another …. Brace yourself never gets easier and time does not heal .. we just learn to compartmentalize. I always reminisce on all the good memories and keep them alive in my heart … God Bless

      • same here .. miss them everyday (2)… who could we not … they were with us for along time and all the memories that linger all around us. Not to mention the empty hole in your heart that you can never seem to fill is always a huge reminder…

  2. Becky,

    I recently found your blog. There are many times each year that I think of Jason and of your family. Given our tradition, one of those times is of course at Thanksgiving. We spent so many wonderful Thanksgivings together with you and Jason: football, sledding, Pink Panther and other movies, swamp monster and games of Pit all come to mind. Even so many years later, the holiday has never been the same for me. I cannot begin to comprehend how much each day and each holiday must hurt for you.

    I know on occasion you visit the Northwest to see Eric and his family. I wanted to reach out on the off chance that you might be in the area this year and have a window. I am in town through the Thanksgiving weekend. I’ve been dreaming of your famous cinnamon rolls and whether I see you and your family or not, I’ve been contemplating trying my hand at making some (although I’ve never made them before) to celebrate Jason. In fact, a friend who shares the same tradition just offered to teach me this morning. So we’ll make them on Wednesday.

    I don’t participate in any social media but I know you have a connection to my mother at least through FB. If you’d like to connect, she can share my contact info. I know my entire family would love to see you as well. Please give my love to everyone.

    Praying for you all at this time of year.

    Happy Thanksgiving.

    Jeana

    • Hi, Jeana.

      Thank you so much for contacting me. It’s been a long time. We won’t be in the PNW for either Thanksgiving or Christmas this year. Please pass along our greetings to all, though.

      I haven’t done any baking for a long time. There’s a local bakery whose cinnamon rolls (they call them sticky buns here in the South) are very similar, and Joe and I splurge once in a while, get one to share and reminisce. Good luck with your baking. It’s a lot of fun and a really memorable tradition.

      Happy Thanksgiving to you, too.

      Becky

  3. Every sentiment expressed here seem words of my own. It will be six years this Dec. 22 that my son Eddie passed. His birthday is coming up Dec 8 . . .the month is so very hard on me. MUSIC – the songs on the radio, just as one mother put it – sometimes the words just hit in the gut. ..and I sob. Often, I thank God that I was allowed to have my precious wonderful son for 45 years – and that I was given the ability to love someone so much that it hurts so badly.

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