Happy birthday, precious boy

This entry was posted in Death of a child, Jason David Carney and tagged , , by Rebecca Carney - One Woman's Perspective. Bookmark the permalink.

About Rebecca Carney - One Woman's Perspective

My name is Becky Carney. My husband, Joe, and I have been married for 46 years. We have two living children, Eric (43) and Jenna (38). We lost a baby in utero at 19 weeks in 1987. In 2002, our middle son, Jason (19), and his best friend, Alina (20), were broadsided by a drunk driver who was going at least twice the speed limit. They both died instantly. This blog is written from my perspective as a bereaved parent. I don't claim to know what it's like to walk in anyone else's shoes. Each situation is different; each person is different. Everyone handles grief differently. But if I can create any degree of understanding of what it's like to be a parent who has lost a child, then I have succeeded in my reason for writing this blog.

2 thoughts on “Happy birthday, precious boy

  1. Thank you for this Becky. Thank you for being so honest. I am not at all religious but so much sounds familiar and helps me feel like I’m not crazy. I just passed the second anniversary of losing my 18 year old son from a fall when he was hiking with friends. I feel like I am losing my mind- the depression, exhaustion, PTSD, little interest in seeing anyone or doing anything, anger at watching the rest of the world go by, intense crying bouts, paralyzing anxiety about simple errands, triggers that send me flying. I recently decided to take a leave from my job. My oldest son and my daughter are finally doing ok, but have left for college. I have my sons friends around often, and these 20 year olds are the only people who I’m comfortable being with. The rest of the world seems to have run for the hills. So many signed up to bring dinners, cards, flowers, but I haven’t heard from them since. Not a text, call, comment, acknowledgement of anniversaries. Coworkers of 20 years- crickets. This was not my first rodeo with loss- my father died when I was 9, my younger brother in my 20’s, my 2 remaining siblings in the past couple of years. I know the drill. My therapist has been my rock, but lately he’s been pushing me hard to reach out and “ trust people.” It makes it seem like the isolation is my fault. If there are people to trust, they haven’t shown up in my lifetime. Thank you for giving me a lifeline today, I really needed it.

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